Attention Leaders Who Also Recruit. Do Yourself a Favor, Stop Recruiting!

I have always disliked the words recruit, recruiter and recruiting. Start with the definition of recruiting……”to attempt to acquire the services of a person for an employer.”

To summarize it one could simply state it’s to acquire someone for something.

When you say it like that it sounds more like buying a car than it does convincing someone to exchange their most valuable commodities (time, effort, energy, creativity) for money. Most leaders who recruit have a passion to partner not employ. To partner is to achieve something through a mutual exchange of best efforts. This can only be accomplished by removing the word recruiting from our vocabulary and inserting “relationship building.”

The term ‘relationship’ is rooted in the word ‘relation’ and is defined as a mutual connection between individuals. Relationships are built where there is mutual understanding between individuals.

What if you built a relationship to the place where you understood what your future business partner wanted from life? Not just from work but also from their life outside of work.

A number of years ago as a mortgage branch manager, area manager and regional manager I began sending photos to people I was pursuing. I obtained them from social media and would use an online frame company to send the picture to the individual. Attached would be a note….

I just wanted you to know that while I lead a team in this business I also wake up each day wanting to help people accomplish more of what they love. In the time I have known you I have found that you love ________. So I wanted you to know I would be honored to partner with you in this crazy business we both love. But mostly I would be honored to help you accomplish more moments like these…….

Let me help you connect the emotional dots on all of this. I have included a video below. Play the video, close your eyes, take in the music but don’t watch the video. Not yet anyways. I simply want you to close your eyes and envision the things you want more of. Review the list below as an example of what to envision while listening to the music:

  • Freedom doing the things you love
  • Important moments created with your spouse, children and friends
  • Building relationships
  • Visiting your favorite vacation spots
  • Spending time doing your favorite hobby
  • Moments serving a cause that you believe in

Okay ready? Click play, close your eyes. Seriously, I need you to close your eyes and visualize these things through the end of the music!


Tell me you did that exercise! What did you feel? Happiness? Peace? Contentment?  A longing to have those moments fulfilled?

I created the video using moments matching the list from my life.

I can also close my eyes and envision important moments in business:

  • Being able to leave the office not having to worry about loan files making closing dates on time
  • A team who surrounds me like my family, all hands on deck when needed
  • A operations team who has a “can do” attitude that wants to serve
  • Incorporating fun into my work as often as one legally can

Convince anyone you can help them accomplish more of these moments and that person will not only join your team but they will give you everything they have.

DELIVER ON THAT and you will keep employees for life!

I am asking you as a leader who also recruits to stop recruiting and began building relationships. 

Figure out what your candidate loves most. Scope out a picture on Instagram or Facebook, send it to them with some variation of my note given above.

But don’t stop with writing the note. Go ahead and deliver on that promise when they join your team.

When leaders over promise, forget or get lazy. When companies take people for granted and don’t deliver on promises, well that’s when people move on.

It’s not rocket science. Give them the opportunity to have more of what they love through good times and hard times. Do this and you will get the best of that person.

Onward and Upward with 100% relationship building and 0% recruiting.

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